I recently had the great fortune to be modelled by a group of Master Practitioner students during a recent course. For the non-NLPers this basically means they ‘interrogated’ me with amazing questions and insight to discover my thought processes, mindset, beliefs and approach when I work with a client.
It brought up many interesting things but one in particular, I believe, can make the difference between success and failure to anyone out there involved in the development of people. Any good coach out there already does it, but so many people don’t think of it.
You know those spot the difference puzzles you used to do when you were a kid? You know ‘spot the 6 differences between these 2 pictures of a spotty cow’? I recently was shown that if you hold the 2 pictures next to each other and cross your eyes (like looking at one of those 3D pictures) the differences ‘shimmer’. It really works, you should try it. It totally blew my mind!
Anyway, whenever I meet anyone for the first time, whether it be someone on a course or perhaps a prospective client, I find that they have a shimmer. Its like a spot the difference.
I see the person in my head with all the potential, possibility, love, happiness and peace that they want. I don’t see ‘problems’. I see the person underneath the problems. The real them. When I compare this to the person in front of me it’s like the differences amplify, I can almost feel them, see the shimmer. My job is then simply to clear that blockage and allow the real them out. When that happens, the person will very quickly begin to get what they want (this is why I am loathe to say I fix problems, I more think of it as freeing people from bullsh!t)
So, if you are in any situation where you have the opportunity to help someone, whether that be a colleague to a friend, hold the real them in your head and ask yourself ‘how is it possible they aren’t already living the life of their dreams?’. Now help them get there.
But do you want something even more powerful? The next time you look in the mirror, see the real you. Do you have all that you want? If you don’t what is it that the ‘real you’ would do differently to get everything you want?
Now for the same advice as last night…go do it!
Be the real you. It’s harder work than you think to be anyone else.