I got a frustrating phone call the other day from someone who had decided that she couldn’t change and that the method of change I was describing, the same method that has helped so many people change, wasn’t going to work for her.
This, for me, is a real shame and, as I said, massively frustrating.
Can I add here, this wasn’t that she didn’t want to talk or that she wasn’t ready. She was desperate for change. She just decided it all sounded too easy.
Let me ask you, how difficult does change need to be?! I can’t work out why it would be better, in anyone’s world, to live a life of anxiety and depression rather than even taking a chance that something might help and make you feel better? Maybe some people simply have a pride or investment in their problems. I know I encounter many people with the attitude ‘I’ve spent 10 years becoming this fu€ked up, how dare you come and take it away from me!!’.
Change is simpler than you think. It’s not always easy but it is simple and, when it happens, it will happen in a second but to get that shift and that change you have to put yourself in the path of help. There comes a time when you have travelled a little too far down a road to be able to help yourself, do you know what I mean?
For example, there’s a point where the sick need to stop taking paracetamol and go see a doctor, there’s a point when that toothache isn’t going away, there’s a point when you need to stop hitting it with a hammer and take it to the garage. There’s a point when everyone needs a helping hand so why do we think we should be different when it comes to our minds and emotions? There is a point where it isn’t going to get better on its own.
Please understand I say this to give you hope and to urge you to seek an answer because there always is one. Always. I know, you are special in many, many ways but I promise you aren’t that special that your head works any different from anyone elses’ and every mind can change when pointed in the right direction. Every mind.
You are not broken. You are not sick. You are not mentally weak. Be confident in your ability to change anything you are going through and, should you need it, be courageous enough to ask for the assistance to do it.