Today’s been a day filled with guilt. It just seems like everyone I spoke to today had a bit of it, in some cases very, very big bits of it!
Here’s what I say about guilt. Guilt is an emotion about the past (in a similar way, anxiety is an emotion about the future). It rarely exists in the moment of creation, it can only ever exist by looking back, it never exists in the future. Never.
But there is something else you need to know about guilt. I promise you that, whatever it is you feel guilty about, if I was to take you back to that very moment, knowing what you knew then, with everything being exactly as it was at that moment, you’d do exactly the same thing again. I could take you back a million times and that same set of circumstances would result in the same outcome. I can guarantee it.
Why? Because that choice you made back then, that one you feel guilty about, was, like it or not, your absolutely best choice at that moment. Right or wrong, it was the best choice you had. W could go as far to say you were near destined to take that choice in that, given the sum of everything you had experienced in your whole life to that very point, what you did was what your mind believed to be the only and best thing available to it.
The key to freeing yourself from guilt? Learn and move on (too many of us miss the learning bit and wonder why we can’t move on. The learning is critical). To replay old scenarios looking for them to be different is futile, its like wishing the earth spun the other direction or wishing you could fly! Somethings can simply never change. Your memories will always stay the same because they have happened, they are past tense, done, finito.
The future on the other hand, that’s a place of possibility. A place where your lessons can be applied to make change and make sure your mistakes of the past never, ever happen again. The future is anything you want it to be, but you have to look there first.
So ask yourself right now, are you really going to pointlessly torture yourself with the mistakes of the past? Or are you ready, to put all you know and have learned into creating your very own awesome future?
I say you can’t change what’s been but i know you can change what’s to come…so, are you ready?